Gordon and I decided to take a pleasant walk around Echo Park Lake instead of our usual Elysian Park slog which allowed me to wear some decent shorts instead of my bloomers. But I love my bloomers. They’re brown and baggy and come down to my knees. Gordon says they’re the ugliest damn things he’s ever seen but I needed them last summer. They were big enough to go over my cast and roomy enough to breath as I sweltered on the couch. I wore them the last time I walked around Echo Park Lake but I got disparaging looks from some hipsters. I consoled myself with the thought that the hipsters, while tatted and mohawked, were fat and ugly. I could change my bloomers but they were still fat and ugly. I think the thought showed on my face because they wilted but Gordon is embarrassed by the bloomers. So I wore Bermuda shorts. They’re still long enough to cover my old-lady legs but they’re not the color of a dried turd. I kept my independence by not shaving my legs. I can feel the wind waving through my stubble. Digression: Actresses and models have been moving into the neighborhood. They used to run the hills in unitards with matching head- and wrist-bands. Their hair was tied back tastefully and they even wore makeup. They were gorgeous and Gordon was in heaven. I ran in my baseball cap, baggy Dodger tshirt, baggy running shorts, with my white stubbly legs hanging above my big ol’ running shoes. No hairstyle, no makeup. Unfortunately for Gordon, the pretty young things have followed suit. We’re all ugly together. But we’re comfortable. You know what? I going back to my bloomers. Maybe I can make a new fashion statement: “I’m sweating! I’m not supposed to be gorgeous!”


With reference to other bloomers the lotuses are opening and the jasmine is fragrant. We saw lots of baby ducks being led by adults and two Canada Geese who hissed at the walkers and dogs if they got too close to the goslings.


About Barbara Schnell

I've dedicated my life to full-time employment avoidance. I've been an actress, renovated a 1921 California Bungalow, set a cash-winning record on $25,000 Pyramid, and came in last on Jeopardy. I live in Los Angeles with my patient husband and two cats.
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